On Co-parenting

I am always in awe when I see two set of parents, no longer together, that can be friends.

You always want what you can’t have, and for me, this is most definitely something I strive for.

Even if it’s only a “you are doing a good job in my eyes”, or “Landyn is okay, feel free to call her whenever”, or “I noticed she is having a hard time, let’s talk about that”.

Basic communication and respect as her parents. Seems painless right?

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 When I sit down and think about my expectations for my co-parenting relationship, I realize it will always be a revolving door. You see, it would be so easy to keep things black and white. But divorce is so far from that. Divorce is a million shades of grey. There are good days and bad. Peace and anger. Influences you have no control of. I’ve hurt and been hurt. We are human. But the reality is, we both found happiness on the other side of it all at Landyn’s expense. That’s the part that gets me.

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All I know is every other weekend I send my girl off to her Dad’s, my entire world becomes void. Is she ok? Did she eat lunch and get to bed on time? Is she happy or sad? Does she miss me as much as I miss her? My heart skips beats and my breathing gets heavy. The entire situation consumes my existence. I feel like I’m being robbed of being a mom 100% of the time. It’s not what I signed up for.

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Chris and I have had a few good conversations over the years. The ones that I leave feeling full and good about our role as parents. But every time, the 50 million shades of grey get in the way. And I am left disappointed for my baby girl.

IMG_8275-.jpgLandyn’s dress c/o Elk Dresses // headband c/o Vintage Rose Wraps // sandals: Target

I struggle with these raw posts. Every time I write them, I feel like I have to hold back so much. This is a day by day situation and I am really doing my best without letting it completely consume my life. I hope one day the revolving doors will bring me more clarity. In the meantime I have so much to be grateful for, as this is only a slice of my reality. Landyn and I have a beautiful life that we would not have been given otherwise. My girl is strong, and confident, and funny, and loving. She’s creative and wise beyond her years. She has two families that love her very much and that is something that will never be compromised.

I challenge you to hug a single parent today. Hands down the hardest job out there. All YOU rocking it are my heros. xo

Lindsay

Paper Doll Clothing Company

It’s been three months since I took the plunge and unveiled my very own clothing line. 3 whole months. We’ve really worked on getting the word out and it’s been such a joy seeing our customers, brand reps, friends and family all in our line.

So today I just wanted to share some pictures of our line in action. Seeing these makes me beam. Thank you to ALL of you that have made Paper Doll possible.

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_MG_0237ed 10.09.27 AMAs seen on Casey Wiegand cuties Apple and Ainleigh 

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IMG_8138-.jpgYours truly and my little miss…

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10517969_832760820075563_3597142131362522395_nAs seen on Lisa Leonard 

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10154422_636707686377842_1189192064598398964_nAs seen on Little Miss Momma cuties Wesley and Sawyer

10174954_631547690227175_3090765825816554416_nAs seen on The Shine Project cuties

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10153256_629110623804215_7078518144730470605_n.jpgAs seen on the In Honor of Design family 

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Feeling so blessed. As a thank you enjoy FREE SHIPPING on all purchases until tomorrow at midnight. We are extending our 4th of July sale.

xoxo

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 Stay up to date with the latest releases, sales, and fun:

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Lindsay

Disneyland

As a kid, my Dad was never a fan of Disneyland. I remember seeing photos of our family trips to the “happiest place on earth” and my Dad looking everything but happy. He hates crowds, lines, and waiting, so Disneyland has never stood a chance.

Fast forward 25 years, and you get your Dad taking his two daughters and GRANDDAUGHTER to Disneyland.

You know your dad loves you when…

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IMG_6008There was a 3 hour wait to meet Elsa and Anna of Frozen. We ain’t got time for THAT. 

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IMG_6058Crusin with Pop Pops.

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IMG_6072My first Dole whip. As good as they are cracked up to be. 

IMG_6079I love my family.

IMG_6090Front row parade seats.

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IMG_6096Mesmerized by the Disney princesses.

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IMG_6097Seeing Elsa made Landyn’s whole year.

IMG_6118Sugar high.

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IMG_6134Chocolate face. Sign of a day well spent.

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It was the perfect day for all of us. Landyn consumed way too many sweets, I got to try my very first Dole Whip (heaven on earth), and we all got to spend quality time together, just the four of us. I may be bias, but Landyn has the best grandparents around. Love you Dad and Mom.

This was Landyn’s third time at Disneyland and by far the best yet. She is a month shy of 5, and I think this is the age they really grasp the Disney magic. Landyn is already asking to go back, naturally, and I’ve toyed with the idea of a season pass, since we don’t live all that far. When I contimplate something I always go back to how I was raised and for me Disneyland was always a “special” place. A place we’d go for birthday’s, finishing my grueling final exams, graduations. I never want Landyn to take for grantid.

 

Lindsay

How Yoga Changed my Life

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I’m not a gym going kind of girl. Besides hearing the phrase “it goes by so fast”, one of the phrases I hear quite often as a Mom is “how do you stay so fit”. I always smile graciously and credit it to living a healthy lifestyle, but for me personally I think it comes down to genes. Thanks Mom and Dad. I enjoy my sweets and I drink entirely too much Diet Pepsi. Hey, I’m working on it.

With that being said, I am not out trying to loose weight. Sure I’d love to tone and there is ALWAYS room for improvement, but the gym is practically torture for me. I’ve learned over the past few months though, that breathing and exercise are two of the best ways to combat anxiety. I remembering rolling my eyes and expecting some sort of quick fix when my therapist told me that for the first time. I wondered why I came into her office each week not seeing improvement… I wasn’t doing my part.

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IMG_8603-.jpgtop c/o Albion Fit // capris: Fabletics // tennis shoes: Nike (similar here) // watch: Michael Kors 

I noticed a friend of mine going to YogaWorks near my house, so I started to do some research. The more I investigated, the more I realized that Yoga was EXACTLY what I needed. Meditation, relaxation, getting in touch with your inner self, working on strength and balance, staying committed to myself, and most importantly, breathing.

I went down to the studio and signed up immediately. It’s been a game changer you guys. With the hustle and bustle of everyday life, taking time out of my day to meditate and do some deep breathing was just not in my cards. I needed to be put in that zen like atmosphere where it was practically forced for me to get to that place. When I walk in that studio, I am able to close the door on the stresses of the outside world and just focus on me. It’s therapy.

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The world isn’t easy. We are all fighting a hard battle. No matter where your struggles lie, know that there is something out there to help combat it. I have felt so alone in my anxiety for YEARS, but the more I find ways to work through it, the more I learn about myself in the process. I know what works for me and what doesn’t. I know the big things to avoid and the little ones too. I am more opt to speak my mind and deal with problems as they arise which has been huge for me. I started making a gratitude journal that I write in daily of all the things I am thankful for. Positive self thoughts make all the difference. I even got Landyn involved in yoga. My yoga studio has family yoga where your kids come and learn the fundamentals. Landyn busts out the downward dog position like its her job. Had I known at a young age how to really BREATHE, a lot of my anxiety would have been alleviated. A calm mommy is a calm child. It’s SO important. If you can’t get into a Yoga studio, do breathing exercises at home. Watch uTube videos, get a group of friends together and form your own group at the park. Work with what you have.

I tell you this because I believe there needs to be more knowledge on natural ways to combat anxious feelings. I am a work in progress and still have anxious days, but I take them as they come. It’s a one day at a time deal. Take them as they come.

Are there any other Yogi’s out there? I would love to hear from you.

 

Lindsay